Tutoring the youth of San Diego today, I blew a great opportunity to use one of my favorite Chef quotes, one of the kids tried to get another one to give him a ride to PB to buy a bong. These are high schoolers, so maybe I should have been concerned, but I wasn’t. What I definitely should have done was told them “Children, there’s a time and place for everything, and it’s called college.”

The older kid didn’t know what a bong was, and claimed he had recently learned what blow job meant. Dude is a senior in high school. He also admitted to skipping class to go study for other classes. I’m concerned for the youth of America.