A Beautiful Mind is on tv. Obviously being schizophrenic and seeing imaginary people would suck, but how bad would it suck if you didn’t like your imaginary friends?

First you have all these jerks no one else could see telling you that the government is reading your thoughts. You probably wouldn’t pay too much attention to them, but sooner or later a real person will catch on and you’ll end up having Charelton Heston grilling you about what you see.

Charleton Heston: What do your friends tell you to do?

Crazy Me: I don’t even like those asswholes.

Heston: But what do they say?

Crazy Me: They want me to make a hat out of twinkies.

Heston: Why didn’t you?

Crazy Me: Cause he kept calling me ‘chief’.

Heston: Are you his chief?

Crazy Me: Do I look like a chief? It’s what he called everybody, fucking annoying.

And that would go on for a while. So if I ever lose my marbles, I hope I get along well with the voices in my head. I’ll try and remember that the next time I see a shooting star.

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